December 2008 Archives

It's December 26, 2008.  I've been unemployed for over 6 months.  I know I've wasted lost of time. That's why I ripped all of my hypnosis tapes onto my computer.  It helps to listen to them daily to keep my motivated.

Going to the library everyday definitely helps to keep my mind active.  Just looking for jobs everyday is depressing.  I need to learn things as well.  I've started reading biographies.  I just started reading the bios of Leonardo Da Vinci and John Adams.  I'm also practicing my Spanish with a language DVD I bought and a slang book I saw at the library.  I'd really like to learn Chinese but I'll have to go to the Los Angeles Central Library to check out their DVDs.  I have Japanese CDs that I listen to sometimes in the car.  They're on my computer so I'm going to listen to them daily, as well.  I remember when I could speak fluently and read and write well too.  I have to find a way to remember. 

Now I have to get back into exercising my body more.  The library gives me a good workout for the brain but not the muscles and all that fat I've accumulated. I think I should start reading the biographies of some super athletes. They're up there on the shelf next to the politicians and artists...

I stayed with my sister and her family from August 9 through October 23, minus the 2 weeks that I watched the house and dog of  Mary Ann and Paul, Doug's sister and brother-in-law, while they were out of town getting married and on their honeymoon. During the first few weeks of my stay, Finnegan pointed out some similarities between my sister and me. 

One day while we were driving around in the van after picking up Finnegan from school, he said: "You two look like you have the same mommy and daddy."  Of course, we said that we did.  A few days later, he asked us to say some things at the same time, like Star Wars, light saber, and Batman.  He had already realized that we looked alike but that we spoke alike as well.  One day he asked us to repeat some words while we were eating dinner.  Nancy said that we were talking "in stereo."  Then Doug said, "Finnegan has two mommys."  We all laughed.  Then Nancy and I decided to say full sentences at the same time.  It was kind of weird.  Then Finnegan told us to "stop talking like that." I think we freaked him out.

Actually, our voices are so similar that I once mistook my own voice on Nancy's answering machine for hers!  I was going to visit her at her dormitory at the University of La Verne so I left her a message that I would arrive at a certain time.  She met me outside and we went to her room where she immediately listened to her answering machine (back in the days when we didn't have cell phones). After she played my message, I said, "Nancy, how stupid that you leave yourself a message that you're going to be coming home!"  She gave me a puzzled look and said, "That's not me.  That's you."  Then I remembered that, indeed, I had left that message! 

It's been six weeks now that I've lived with my parents, or 5 if I subtract the week that I was at my sister's in Seattle for an interview. Fortunately, I started to receive my unemployment insurance checks from the State a few weeks ago, so I have been able to relax a little about bills and my future.  I must admit that I am very glad to live in country where the government has a program for employers to pay into it and then give back to workers in their time of need.  I was really stressed before when I was just living off of my savings. Now I just have to secure some type of employment and move out to my own place.

Once you're out of work for a while, it's hard to maintain a routine that gets you out of bed every morning for a reason.  I started going to the library or employment office everyday so that I have that routine. The library is better because I don't get kicked out after an hour like at the employment office.  The homeless guys take advantage of the policy all the time.  I can't blame them.  It's a free, warm space with plenty of reading material and free, clean bathrooms.

I've got my usual spot in the back in between the geneaology section and nonfiction. There's plenty of space to spread out my bags, computer, books and DVDs.  And I've got free reign of all the books in the library.  Sometimes I stay there for 4 - 5 hours, applying for jobs, watching TV programs, e-mailing people, etc.  I make all of my phone calls out in the parking lot inside my car because I can't get reception up at my parents'. Basically, it's my office.  Now I tell my mom that I'm going to "the office" when I head out to the library. 

Today's Monday so I'm not at the library, which is closed on Sundays and Mondays. So I am at my favorite coffee shop, C-Note Coffee and Blues Cafe, a really homely little place run by some kooky guys with beards and glasses.  It's located inside Hemet's old train depot.  The museum is in the depot, too.  There's free wifi so people come here to work or study.  And there are people who come here to play board games as well.  

My nephew Finnegan just turned 4 years old and he is really smart.  He has such a great vocabulary.  In addition, he is pretty funny without even trying.  Here are some of the funnier things he's said. 

• "I'll say darn if I wanna say darn."
• "I think you're gonna cry."
• When playing school with me, he says that my daddy will drop me off at school.  He makes me go into his room and before he shuts the door, he says:"I think you're gonna cry."   After I cry for a while, much to his amusement, he checks in on me, at which point I say that I want to go home.  He replies: "You have to wait till your mommy picks you up."
• Finnegan asked my sister, "Mommy, is Barbara your friend?"  Nancy replied, "No, Barbara's my sister."  (And I thought I was both....) So I asked Finnegan if Elijah, his little brother, was his friend.  He replied, "No...You know, I'm allergic to nuts."
• While playing cards with a table full of adults, Finnegan said, " Everyone, stop talking.  I'm the game master."
• Of course, I would be remiss to leave out one of the things that he asks me very regularly: "Can I watch Sesame Street?"  Needless to say, I've got the website bookmarked on my computer and have memorized a whole lot of Sesame Street songs, games, and little videos.  Now, whenever I see an actor on TV, the first thing that comes to mind is the Sesame Street skit that he/she appeared in. As my sister puts it, "You know you've made it as a performer when you get to appear on Sesame Street." 

Well, it's been quite a while since I've written in this blog.  Shame on me.  I told everyone that this was the best way to know what was going on with me.  However, I'm no computer genius and managed to mess up my internet connection when I tried to connect at the Nampa Library in good old Idaho.  While visiting/living with my friend, Stephanie, I went to various places to log on to the internet.  The Nampa Library's wifi is not easy to connect to so I followed the library's very long, complex instructions and still couldn't log on.  Well, as luck would have it, I messed up my chances of logging on to any wifi connection.  So, for about 6 weeks, I was without a personal connection.  I've been using other computers but they're not the same.  At any rate, while on a short trip to Seattle this week for a job interview, my brother-in-law Doug was able to fix up my computer "in 5 minutes," as my sister predicted.  Actually, he fixed it in about 30 seconds but he had to wait 4 and a half minutes for the computer to boot up and go through the motions.

So, there's so much to report.  I guess I'll start with my list of "Finnegan-isms."  I have had some good laughs at the things my little nephew says.